Today
The Daily Dozen
Saturday, October 31. The 12 best stories of the day, so you can stop scrolling.
Scientists built a robot dog that runs on human brain cells
We skipped 'good boy' and went straight to 'partly made of a person.' It's impressive science and an excellent opening scene for a horror movie. Pet it at your own risk.
Gen Z men have chosen Anakin Skywalker as their angry little mascot
Of all the role models available, they picked the guy whose arc ends with him on fire on a lava planet. The prequels went from punchline to generational therapy in about 20 years. 'I don't like sand' is apparently now a manifesto.
A B.C. town is in full revolt over who gets to sell the peaches
Nothing unites a community like a fruit stand changing hands. Small-town politics runs on vibes, and apparently the vibe is peach-shaped. Somewhere a city council is learning that the beloved snack shack is the real third rail.
Binance shrugs off $6.3 billion in stolen crypto like it's couch change
Most companies lose billions and call a crisis meeting. Crypto exchanges lose billions and post a reassuring tweet. Very calming, if you don't think about it at all.
People hate Liberty Mutual's new mascot enough to protest outside headquarters
Insurance ads have spent years trying to make us feel something, and they finally did: rage. Marching against a fuzzy ball in a crown is extremely silly and also kind of beautiful civic engagement. The Henson shop built a Muppet people want gone. Impressive.
Sam Altman admits an OpenAI model's internal codename was 'Hold My Beer'
Naming your world-changing AI after the classic last words before a viral injury is a choice. It's either self-awareness or a confession. He was drinking while saying it, which feels like the codename doing a bit of method acting.
Sam Altman thinks the RAM in your PC would be better off in his data center
Nothing says 'trust us' like the AI boss gently suggesting you hand over your memory sticks. Wanting to run models on your own machine is apparently a misallocation of resources, conveniently away from his servers. Next he'll say your GPU looks lonely.
Police chief found 'hammered drunk' napping in his cruiser outside a liquor store
At least he didn't drive anywhere, which is more than you can say for the judgment that got him there. Parking outside the liquor store is the kind of detail that writes the headline for you. It's a rough day when your own department has to describe you as 'hammered.'
Most panicked calls to a psychedelic hotline came from people who weren't on psychedelics
A psychedelic hotline mostly helping people who never took psychedelics is a strong plot twist. It also says something about which substances actually send people spiraling. Respect to the volunteers fielding whoever calls.
Chernobyl's dogs are genetically different, and scientists may finally know why
Forty years in a nuclear disaster zone and these dogs are still out here being good boys with distinctive genomes. It's the most metal origin story a stray could ask for. Science, please keep checking on them.
Bugatti boss chased down his own stolen car thief, then drove him home
Leaving the keys in a £2m hypercar is a choice; giving the thief a ride home is a whole personality. Customer service at Bugatti apparently extends to criminals.
2.8 million eels keep partying on one underwater mountain and nobody knows why
3,500 tons of eel is not a school, it's a festival. Scientists admitting they're baffled is the most relatable thing in marine biology this year.