Today
The Daily Dozen
Wednesday, November 4. The 12 best stories of the day, so you can stop scrolling.
Moths keep evolving their genitals into anti-bat weapons
Evolution looked at the moth, looked at the bat, and decided the solution was in the trousers. Seven times! When nature lands on the same weird answer that often, you kind of have to respect it.
Couple in dinosaur costumes arrested after Publix checkout line brawl
There is no dignified way to get arrested in an inflatable T. rex suit, and these two found that out at Publix. The tiny arms alone should have ruled out fisticuffs. Jurassic Park warned us that life finds a way. It apparently also finds the express lane.
Kellogg's is pulling rice grains from Rice Krispies, blaming the weather
Snap, crackle and supply chain. When a cereal named after rice starts cutting back on the rice, you have to wonder what the Krispies are made of now. Climate change is coming for breakfast, one sad bowl at a time.
Medieval humans helped trigger two lake tsunamis, and we could do it again
Somewhere a medieval farmer did something to a hillside and the lake took it personally. It's a useful reminder that 'we've always done it this way' is not a geological safety rating.
Kim Kardashian returns to 'the worst TV drama ever' and says she's been taking acting seriously
Few people respond to being told their show is the worst ever by ordering another season. That's the Kardashian business model in one move: the reviews are bad, the ratings are good, and the bar has nowhere to go but up.
Gamers say they'd give up sex, booze and even pets to play GTA 6 early
Giving up sex for a video game is one thing, but trading in the dog is a cry for help. To be fair, after years of waiting, the delays have clearly broken some people. Rockstar could start charging in Labradors.
Texas surveillance cameras vandalized with the message 'Release the Epstein Files'
Spray-painting a political demand onto surveillance cameras is a bold choice of venue, since the cameras are presumably the ones taking notes. And the local resident's 'not concerned' quote is a perfect small-town news shrug.
Scotsman avoids jail after being caught with drugs and a lamb named Pablo
Naming your lamb Pablo while driving around with a car full of cocaine is either a cry for help or the most committed bit in Scottish legal history. Pablo, we hope, has a lawyer of his own.
The internet invented 'Frutiger Aero yams' and nobody knows what they are
The internet loved a nostalgia aesthetic so hard it turned into a yam. This is peak brainrot: meaningless, horny and somehow a sharp bit of culture criticism.
UK removes the masts from its sunken WWII bomb ship, leaves the 13,700 explosives
Britain has a ship full of WWII munitions sitting off its coast and the big intervention is taking down the bits sticking out of the water. Very 'we'll deal with the actual problem later' energy, which has been the plan for about 80 years.
Binance says a $6.3B heist started with a fake job interview and a bad Google ad
Six billion dollars, undone by the oldest trick in the recruiter's handbook: 'quick take-home assignment.' Somewhere a hacker sat through multiple rounds of interviews they had no intention of hiring from, which honestly makes them more committed than most real HR departments.
This rave's crowd is under 5 and home by bedtime
Honestly the purest club scene left: nobody's on their phone, everyone is dancing badly with full confidence, and the meltdowns are at least age-appropriate.